A Photo Geeks ups and downs through words and images.
As we entered the Harriet Tubman Underground Railroad Center. I looked to my left to see this shadowy, low lit hallway. It was the beginning of what turned out to be a historical journey through an often ignored important part of our history.
The key to living is to never allow yourself to stop learning. It’s an essential part of growth and navigating lives challenges. When I think of some of the most important lessons I’ve learned as a photographer. I often think of an exchange with a friend and fellow photographer. Shortly after our friendship began , our passions were shared. We met up to talk photography, amongst other things, while sharing our work. His critique “What did a shadow ever do to you?” regarding the rather flat nature of some of my studio images. Made me think and ultimately, start a journey that turned my fear of failing to a love of shadows.
As I exited my patio and turned to close the gate behind me. I spotted a rather large creature attatching itself to my second bedroom window screen. Although I hadn’t encountered one since I was five years old. I immediately recognized it was a praying mantis. “My God. What a beautiful and rare moment.” I stood there paralyzed. I wanted to run inside to get my camera in order to capture the moment. But the risk and fear of scaring it away was more than I could overcome. Instead I reached for my iPhone and managed a few shots while marveling in its presence. A few hours later, I was back on the patio and guess who was still there? Yup. that same praying mantis. This time, with no fear of scring it away. I went back inside to grab my camera and attempt to capture the moment. Living here in Viirginia has presented many first encounters I won’t soon forget. Though I often miss the pigeons and squirrels that populate the city I lived most of my life in. Virginia has gifted me with some of the most colorful birds I’ve ever seen. This recent gift, however, completely blew my mind.
Side note: Did you know the praying mantis is known for devouring it’s sexual partner after intercourse. It is said, that the term “One night stand.” originated form the praying mantis’s practise?
When I think of my childhood adventures, I try not to over-dramatize my experiences. Knowing full well how many people had similar and much, much worse upbringings. Mine, for the most part, were very different from my friends and the kids I grew up with. What seems unique is how colorful and detailed these experiences remain. It’s almost as if I cherry-picked to relay these stories somehow with the knowledge that, in many cases, I was too young to understand what was happening right before my eyes. I try to write with a split sense of vision. One as a young observer. Another as a knowing adult.
While many, I would say, recollections feed off of repetitious encounters with regular people in my life. It’s the memory of brief encounters that baffle me. One, in particular, stands out due to how detailed I can still recall the short yet memorable meeting. By the age of eight, my parents were divorced, and my Dad had left his job at the bus company to pursue other ventures. He was involved with several hustles, including running numbers, loansharking, and illegal casino games near the local bar. Nothing too shady, yet nothing you’d bring up at school when the kids were asked, “So tell the class what your Dad does for a living..” According to the divorce, my Dad had weekend custody, and the weekends always featured nights at the bar and collecting money from those who risked but, did not cover the spread.
When my grandmother wasn’t available to watch me, my Dad would bring me along to collect money from the many degenerate gamblers I got to know over the years. One in particular stood out, and here’s why.
Imagine this muscular yet thin 6’4 Black Irishman (That’s what they called Irishmen with black hair and eyes at the time.) walking through the door with this dwarf-sized eight-year-old at his side. Imagine the mix of fear and folly. No matter the time, place, or situation. I always had that wide-eyed curiosity that amassed countless questions to fire at will throughout the night. Although we had visited many houses, apartments, and basements before. This guy’s scene was on another level. His loft apartment had several pinball machines and a giant waterbed with ceiling mirrors above it. (Now remember, I was only eight years old.) I couldn’t help but think, “Who the hell wants to look at themself when it’s time to sleep? The guy was greasy, fat, with black, wavy hair. (Former male porn star Ron Jeremy comes to mind.) Then came the big WTF? His fingernails were manicured to a standard size, with the noted exception his pinky, which was uncut and eccentrically long. At the time, I had very little knowledge of drug culture and ways to consume cocaine. It was weird and a bit scary. I remember wanting to get the hell out of there. How the experience and sacrifice might award me some Chinese food on the way home. I never returned to that place and don’t recall seeing that guy again. But the memories remain.
After gaining some lost sense of balance. I’ve decided that I want to start photographing people again. Not that I’m nessecarily interested in models, actors or musicians. Just the exercise of a good portrait. One that tells a story of delves deep into a persons personal story and personality. I miss that. I miss that sense of capturing a moment or a mood. In recent years I’ve gone from an extrovert to a wallflower, and I’m not sure I like it. So here goes. Maybe this week I’ll strike up a conversation with a stranger and propose a session. I used to be quite good at talking to strangers. Maybe I can still pull it off. If I do. You’ll be the first to know. Here’s to following your heart.
Due to a previous weekend in the hospital. I missed my opportunity to post to the blog. A week later though, I was back at my old tricks and reminded to never again attend a state fair. Below is an imageI shot when exploring the barns where horses, shjeep, goats and cows shield themselves from the heat of the relentless summer sun. Enjoy.
As I sit here with my wife watching a You Tube video titled “Ghost towns and Abandoned places.” I wonder aloud, “Are my days of exploring uncharted territory and off limits properties over?” As early as the age of seven. (Long before I had a camera or the aching to use one. I was exploring the many off limits junk yards, body shops and construction sites of my Queens neighborhood. There was a burnt out house a few blocks from where my Dad lived and believe me, we explored every nook and cranny of the two story home and seperated garage. Getting a camera and reaching the age of accountability changed little. I still had that explorers curiousity and drive to find what was beyond that “No Trespassing” sign. My hopes are that there is still plenty of that desire to explore, and my ability to ignore my wife when she snaps, “Chop, Chop!” or overthinks every I make to ignore those posted warning signs.
Earlier today while enjoying breakfast at at Washington DC’s Union Market. I conversed with a stranger, recommending one of the booths for their outstanding pastrami sandwich. (Yeah, I know I shouldn’t be eating pastrami for breakfast. But I’m from New York City. So here’s my get out of food jail card.) I haven’t been very social and conversations with complete strangers have become something of the past. Considering his reaction to my recommendation and the smile that came with it. I went away feeling good.When I ran into him again as we were heading to our car. He approached me with that same smile telling me that he took my recommendation and thoroughly enjoyed it. That small exchange made me feel like my old self again. The person who made friends with a smile and a wink. A tip of the proverbial hat. I miss that guy.
Get weird. Be weird. Stay weird.
As I sit hear in the window enjoying the rain. I look forward to the weekend in hopes that the ever changing weather will relent to our wishes that it be bright, sunny and welcome to all that respect its beauty. I remind us all, including myself, to enjoy every moment, place and the people who improve your life with their mere presence.
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